Why “wanting it” is not enough

This is going to be a “Mama Bear” post today. As always, and I’ll say it even though you already know it  – this isn’t me calling any one specific person or people out (besides myself mostly!)… today we are talking about “wanting it”.

I may be a coach / mentor, but I’m an author first, just like you all  – and that adds an extra layer of “walking the walk”, an extra layer of “lead by example”, and DEFINITELY an extra layer of calling myself out on my own bullsh!t and giving myself a swift kick in the butt when needed.

I share these things because if I experience them as an author… or I help any of my customers / students through these experiences, then there is a near 100% probability that other authors can benefit from hearing the same message.

So… what am I rambling about?

Imma gonna drop some truth here that’s likely going to feel a bit uncomfortable.

Ready?

“Wanting it” is NOT ENOUGH.

I want to be a successful author.

Great. Not enough.

I want to earn a living with my books.

Awesome! Not enough.

I want tons of fans reading my books!

Abso-friggin-lutely!!

But… not enough.

Why?

Because “I Want It” is not enough.

Not by itself.

There is a chasm the size of the Jupiter between “I want it” and “I did it”

That’s the bad news…

The good news?

There is ONE thing… just ONE thing that you need to be able to bridge that chasm.

Ready?

Commitment.

Oooh… now that’s a tough one… because it is ONE thing… but it is one of the hardest things.

I’m going to tell you some things you already know:

If you’re a writer, you LOVE (and sometimes hate) to write.

If you “Want to Be A Writer” for reals… you know how much WORK it is  – this is NOT a job for the faint of heart.

Being a full-time professional writer is a damned hard job. It is constant worry, and having to do a LOT of inside work… and no, I’m not talking about working inside your house at your desk…

I’m talking about “inside of YOU work”.  The longer I’m an author, and the longer I work with clients and students there is ONE thing that becomes more and more clear:

90% of being an author  – of making a REAL go at this thing  – is mindset.

Getting over your own inner BS.

Doing the “inside work” that ONLY YOU CAN DO.

Me, other coaches, friends, writing buddies… they can give you tools to help you do all the outside things… I can even give you tools to help you do the inside things…

BUT I CAN’T DO IT FOR YOU.

Commitment.

YOU have to COMMIT to doing the thing you said you want to do and have.

YOU have to do that.

Rogue’s Life  – book 5 of the Chronicles  – didn’t get finished for over a year after I had planned to have it finished.

Why?

“Other things happened.”  Work came up.  Started a brand new business.  COVID-19.

I could insert whatever “REASON” I wanted to there.

But it boils down to one… JUST ONE… thing.

Commitment.

NOW: That being said… just like our writing rituals… our writing “schedule”… our individual processes…

Commitment can look slightly different for each of us.

Obviously no one is telling anyone to quit their job that pays their rent to go “do this thing” right now today.

But, if you don’t commit to it… if you don’t look at yourself and make that commitment to yourself that you are going to DO THIS… that you are going to be open to learning, growing, improving, and putting in the work… then it isn’t going to happen  – at least it isn’t going to happen the way maybe you’ve envisioned it in your mind.

I can’t “GIVE” you the commitment you need anymore than I could write your story for you.

That’s inside work.

(and if I wrote your story for you… it wouldn’t be YOUR story anymore, would it?) 😉 

So… what does commitment look like?

It means showing up and putting words together every single day that you say you are going to write.

It means figuring out where in your list of life priorities writing fits. If the “author life” you dream of is something you truly, deeply want for yourself and your future, then it should be pretty high up on that list.

Mine falls somewhere under my family and my health  – and, confession time, there have been many times when I gave my work priority OVER my health, which I’ve learned is a big no-no!

Commitment  – that is, making a TRUE COMMITMENT TO WHAT YOU SAY YOU WANT  – will stir up some of those mindset issues: fear, worry about judgement, not good enough, ALLLLL those things that require inside work to sort through.

If you make a commitment to something big  – something like CONSTRUCTING AN AUTHOR CAREER  – (that’s pretty big, I mean, come on!)  – it will bring up some feelings of excitement, nervousness, the “ACH, can I really do that?”… all of those feelings.

Some ‘SCIENCE’ to remember…

Something to keep in mind: biologically, in your physical body, your body, your nervous system does not know the difference between nervous anxiety and excited energy… it’s actually the same signals / many of the same bodily reactions… the difference between them is what LABEL we put on it with our brain.

Feeling anxious / nervous about your commitment? Flip it… remind yourself that you are feeling excitement, anticipation… remind yourself of how it will FEEL to have achieved it.

WRITE YOUR COMMITMENT DOWN.

Put it on post-it notes around your house where you’ll see them all the time.

Make a pretty desktop wallpaper for your computer that has your commitment on it.

Do the same for your phone!

How many hours, how much blood, sweat, and tears do you think an Olympic athlete puts in before they get the gold medal? Hell… before they even get selected to GO to the Olympics?

If you want a Gold Medal Olympic-sized author career… how much commitment do you think you need to be ready to take on?

Something to keep in mind and think about:  your data and your facts show  – they clearly reflect back to you  –  your level of commitment.

AND:  Before “IT” can be extraordinary, you must be committed.

I can write it for you. I can’t make your commitment for you… no one can. Only you can do that.

Are you ready to do that?